When my husband and I first found out I was pregnant, we went to the store and bought some safari and dinosaur baby clothes to announce the news to our family. Safari was neutral, and I love dinosaurs, so why not?

I had just lost my Grandma Jean unexpectedly to cancer in February and found out I was pregnant in June 2024, after returning from the family vacation I should have been spending with her. I remember wishing she could have been there to share that excitement with us, to know about the baby, and eventually meet the little person we were bringing into the world.

These days, you can do an early blood test for genetic abnormalities and gender at the end of your first trimester. I had already made a list of baby names and combinations for a girl or boy, but I had this special girl’s name combination I had put together to honor my Grandma Jean, along with my other grandmothers who have already passed. I fell in love with the name and the prospect of having a baby girl. My mom and I are thick as thieves, and I wanted a relationship like that one day with my own daughter. I imagined all the memories we could make and the things I could share with her.

The blood test came back, and everything looked good. There were no abnormalities. I let my mom see the gender results so she could plan a reveal with both sides of the family. We did the confetti cannons, and lo and behold… out came blue!

We were having a boy!

I smiled and hugged my husband. I’m not really a jumper-and-cryer kind of gal. But I won’t say I wasn’t a tad quiet, as I had to shift to our upcoming reality of having a little boy.

I was still glad to know what we were having so I could get the nursery ready and create a baby registry. I won’t say I wasn’t bummed that our first and “possibly” only wasn’t a girl, or that the name and future relationship I had pictured in my head wouldn’t be coming to fruition like I had hoped.

However… the pregnancy progressed. I picked dinosaurs for his nursery theme and found cute boys’ clothes that I would get to dress him in when he arrived. My husband and I picked out his first name together, and each of us chose a middle name for him that meant something to us.

When he got here, he was perfect! Even though he was six weeks early, you wouldn’t have known it. He was adorable! I’m pretty sure I stared at him and took in every detail of his little face for the first two days after he was born.

As he has gotten older, I have realized that although having a little girl would have been cool, I felt more equipped to raise a little boy. Not because girls can’t enjoy the same things I do, but because I knew the kind of childhood I could share with my son.

I grew up a tomboy. My two older sisters were already out of the house by the time I was into my double digits, and I only had my little brother to play with. I dressed in boys’ clothes, played outside in the woods, roughhoused, played with Nerf and airsoft, and hung out with all of my brother’s basketball friends. I learned how to fish and use tools from my dad, skills I would put to use later as an adult. I didn’t like girl drama and didn’t have many “girl” friends around at any given time.

As I got older, some things changed, but that tomboy side of me never really went away. I learned to enjoy getting dressed up, wearing makeup, and maybe even putting on a dress when I’m in the mood. But I can still hang out in the woods and do guy stuff with the best of them. I met my husband at church, we fell in love, and got married. Even now, I’m still the one who does most of the outdoor and manual labor around the house because that’s where my skills lie, whereas my husband isn’t quite as handy in those areas.

I think that comfort came from the way I grew up and spent my childhood. I didn’t play with babies or Barbie dolls growing up, I never took dance classes, and I hate prolonged shopping trips with no goal in mind. Of course, that doesn’t mean a little girl couldn’t enjoy all the same things I do. I just knew I had plenty of experiences I couldn’t wait to share with a little boy.

I could relive some of my favorite childhood experiences while raising Asher. He loves being outside and dinosaurs. I’ll show him how to build things once he’s older, how to get dirty, and how to work hard. If my grandpa and dad don’t beat me to it, I will show him how to fish like they once taught me.

I didn’t think I wanted to be a boy mom until:

• I held him and snuggled him and listened to his little baby coos.
• He gave me his first intentional, toothless smile, and every smile after that.
• His cries softened with my presence and comfort.
• His little voice learned how to say “mama.”
• His arms wrapped around my neck as he hugged me with meaning… and orneriness.
• He looked for me in a crowded room.
• He wanted to snuggle in to sleep.
• He “attacked” and wrestled with me, and I heard his belly laughs that were so pure and adorable. It’s one of my favorite sounds in the world.
• Seeing how he is inquisitive, too smart for his own good, funny, sensitive, kind, and oh so loving.

God knew what He was doing when we found out we were having a boy. Our plans are never as good as what He has planned for us. God knew I needed to be a boy mom, not just any boy, but “Asher’s mama.” My gift from Heaven.

Asher reminds me to be slow and intentional, to see the happy side of things, to be funny, and to love unconditionally. To be 100% yourself, even if you might look like a fool while doing it.

I wish for you, Asher, that in this world you don’t lose that joy and happiness in your soul and that you continue to love others fiercely. I hope you continue growing your sense of humor and brightening others’ days like you do ours every day, even when you’re being a little feisty and ornery.

God made me a boy mom, and whatever more He gives to our family will be perfect in His plan.

With love, little boy laughter, and a grateful heart – The No Bull Mommy